Bitter
I drove
past the stewart's where
i craved a root beer float
I drove,
making the left turn
onto yet another street
whose name I haven't bothered
to learn

Bitter
I drive
not missing cigarettes
not missing even you
time has frozen but trips
it skips and folies and rehashes
elementary school stories
it remembers dreams of
an imaginary bank, cathedral ceilings
a painting stories-high
of a face i can't recognize

Bitter
I realize I'm blown my heart
and the alocation of caring is spent
apathy sets in and I won't love you
even if I saw you fade and die before
Not until the spell, the dream has passed
I can't and I don't know how and it's like
I'm no longer able because it's overload my circuits
shut down my neurotic mind
my brain focuses, an aperature closing
I can only think of breath
of fruit juice, of the scent of grass in the air

I won't lie on the floor
for fear that
I won't ever get up