great
if only
in my own mind

loved
if only
in distant hearts

i drive to the lake
to the center of cornered towns
past houses where you don't live
and where I can't sleep
anymore

cigarettes on the back of my tongue
razorblade barbs on my chin
paintless nails
suitcases of yesterday
strapped to my back
a pack
mule

forcing exuberance
and most other gestures
and emotions
that will miss your gaze
once again