Monday, November 24, 2008

I Lied

It kept me up a good part of the night.

I said I didn't want to help. But I did. I do. I just.... can't anymore.

And then I began to worry. Will he be ok? He won't do anything stupid will he?

Then I just try to remember that he's the one who didn't want me in his life. He's a big boy. He's got his family and all those car buddies (ahem) that he made toward the end of our relationship. I mean... we were best friends and he sent me a message clear and strong that he didn't need me or my friendship or my love. He chose this life.

The guilt will wear off in a couple days I suppose. I just wonder when the compassion and lingering annoying love will.

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