Meh.

ugh.

going crazy.

keep picking at scabs. not literally.

am trying not to be upset. am trying not to be hurt or scared or pissed off.

am trying to manifest serenity and let loose control.

am trying to let things gravitate and not pull or push.

am trying not to be hard on myself.

am quite aware that obsessing never helped anything

is making herself crazy and tired.

maybe a nap will help.

want to attach live wires to keys so i will be shocked if i do that what I'm not supposed to do.

may just throw phone and computer into east river.

am trying not to kick my own ass for needing an ass kicking